The Ugly "D" Word

The ugly "d" word...discipline. I don't like discipline. It's work. It's uncomfortable. It's sometimes even painful. I don't like it, but I like the results of it. It's sometimes tough forcing myself to go to the gym. However, when I consistently exercise a few times a week, I like experiencing the increase in strength, energy, and toned muscles. I like spending money on things I want, but when I set boundaries and make wise financial decisions, I like seeing the increase in our savings and net worth. And sometimes I would just rather watch TV and turn off my brain than dive into Scripture. However, when I do study God's Word, I like the change God brings about in my life.

For a large chunk of my childhood, I participated in AWANA. Because the program had such an emphasis on memorizing Scripture, I learned several verses growing up. My motivation for memorizing Scripture was largely to pass the sections in our books and earn prizes. Sadly, many of those verses didn't "stick", and after my time in AWANA ended, I no longer continued the practice of memorizing Scripture. I was often convicted about this. Sometimes I kind of listened to that conviction and attempted to come up with a plan to memorize Scripture. And sometimes, I just ignored the conviction.

Fast forward to just over a year ago. Nathan and I began attending Harvest Bible Chapel. It was there where I was introduced to expository preaching. Having grown up in churches that typically defaulted to the topical-style of preaching, I wasn't all that familiar with the style HBC tends to use. It didn't take long (the first service, in fact) for me to find that I LOVE the expository style of preaching! I was excited more than ever before for the Sunday morning services. And I was challenged at an unfamiliar (but much needed) level during each service. There is something about unapologetically diving into God's Word during a church service that is refreshing, challenging, and convicting.

Besides being challenged at HBC, I'm also married to an amazing man who loves God's Word and knows it pretty well. I became more and more aware of my need to dive into Scripture more than I ever had before. So, this summer, I talked with Nathan about purchasing some sermons from the HBC bookstore, thinking that it might be good to start listening to sermons rather than just music all the time. Because our pastor also has a radio ministry, many of his sermons are available on CD and in our church bookstore. As we looked at the various sermons available, we chose to start with the series on Hebrews. It's Nathan's favorite book of the Bible, so he had no objections to that, and I wanted to find out why he liked Hebrews so much. So, that just seemed like the logical decision. I began listening to those sermons over and over and over again. I also downloaded John Piper's series on Hebrews and began listening to those messages, as well. At some point, the thought hit me, "Maybe I should try to memorize Hebrews." Yes, conviction regarding Scripture memory hit me again, and I knew it would take quite a bit of discipline (also known as work) for me to memorize those 13 chapters. However, I was becoming more motivated to actually do something about the conviction this time. And so, I "began" my journey into the world of Scripture memorization.

When it comes to memorizing Scripture, some people say they just can't memorize it or they're not good at it. I never used that excuse, at least not that I can remember. I honestly do not believe that excuse is all that valid. After all, most know song lyrics, trivia, or quotes. I'm not necessarily trying to say memorizing Scripture is easy. However, I do believe it's easier than many claim it to be, as can be seen in a recent blog post (with video) that I saw by John Piper's daughter-in-law. (You need to see this video! It's extremely precious but also convicting!) I'll be the first to admit that my issue was not an inability to memorize Scripture. It was an issue of laziness. And really, when you get to the root of it, the issue was idolatry. I chose to watch TV, surf the net, e-mail, read a book, listen to music rather than meditate on God's Word. I was choosing my own comfort instead. I was basically saying (with my actions) that hiding God's Word in my heart was not worth the effort, the work, the discipline. I now see the ugliness of this attitude in my life and am so thankful that God has been changing me.

So...back to Hebrews...I realize that Hebrews seems kind of a weird place to begin. Why not individual verses? Why an entire book? And if an entire book, why not something like Philippians (which is pretty familiar) or 2 John (which is only 13 verses)? Well, to put it simply, that's where God had me. I also found that memorizing an entire book (or at least longer passages of Scripture) rather than individual "random" verses helped give me a definite direction and goal. It also provided a much better context of each verse I was learning. I was learning Hebrews through sermons and found a growing interest in learning it at a deeper level. So, memorizing it seemed like a good way to go deeper with it.

Memorizing Hebrews did take work, of course. As soon as I got up in the morning, I began working on (or practicing) it. I came to a point of even keeping the radio off in the car until I got through everything I had learned so far. As I worked-out at the gym, I was also working on memorizing Scripture. When I got up from my desk to go to the restroom, I was going through Scripture in my head. And although it wasn't the most natural thing to do all this at first, God used it to help me keep my focus on Him throughout the day. He used it to teach, challenge, humble, and grow me. Songs that focus on Him have more depth when I listen them. His Word has come alive in a way that I haven't experienced before as I study it. There has been a definite change in my heart, all the work of God, of course. And I have come to love and crave His Word in a very real way. Sometimes I wonder why I took so long in listening to Him when convicted about Scripture memory, but then I find myself so thankful that He opened my eyes and heart to be obedient to Him.

I have found it interesting that as I have ventured into the world of Scripture memorization, this topic has been popping up elsewhere, as well. John Piper gave a challenging message on this a few weeks ago. Tim Challies has extended an invitation through his blog to memorize Scripture together. And of course, the blog with video that I mentioned above. Each has been confirmation of the extreme importance of taking that time and effort to spend time really learning God's Word. It's not out of duty, as was more likely the case when I was much younger. Instead, it's out of a growing desire to know God better and deeper than before. As I've heard it said, "What you starve will die. What you feed will thrive." This has been an amazing adventure so far, and I'm excited to see how God will continue to teach, grow, and change me through His Word.


"And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates." (Deuteronomy 6:6-9)